There’s no polite way to get this out of my mouth

Oh, that's a surprise. Living in L.A., land of meticulous physical upkeep, botox and bikinis, I didn't quite expect such a... 70s decor here underneath your panties. Well, no use thinking about it, I'll just dive in and...

Uh-oh. Is that…? Oh crap, it is. Right on the side of my tongue, I can feel it, like a little piece of string. What do I do now? I'm already on my way out here … I guess I could spit it out, quietly… oh, Christ, that'll never work. She'll hear, and what kind of message would it send? I guess I could reach up and grab it, but she'll see and be embarrassed and who knows what will happen after that. Argh. Let's face it, there's just no polite way to get this pube out of my mouth.

C'mon dude, think. You can do this. Should I head back into the jungle and just hope things work out on their own? Assume that all the movement will somehow resolve this issue in a discreet manner? No, the moment has clearly passed, going back would seem like overkill.

Oh no – at the navel now. What about direct honesty? What if I just laid it out there. "Hang on a second, one of your pubes is caught in my mouth and I would like to get it out in a timely manner." Nice, Romeo, that'll do it. Good work.

Passing the boobs… How about just clearing my throat? Would that do it? A short, polite half-cough? But what about phlegm? And what if I swallow accidentally?

Oh crap, she's going to kiss me… That's it, I'm just going to have to use a finger… Or is this a test of our budding relationship? Am I supposed to be comfortable with this at this stage? Will she be offended that I don't want it in there? Son of a bitch what if… Oh, wait. There it goes.