Gang Bangin' Green

Whether you're a Grape Street Crip or a Witmer Street Loco, the fact remains, global warming effects every hood. If Los Angeles gangs were to adopt a more eco-friendly approach to crime, then the city could guarantee a sustainable, thriving arena for turf wars well into 2060.

Regardless of the set you claim, remember ese, no Earth means no theft, no vandalism, no murder, and no consumption of illegal narcotics.

The next time you're rolling up to smoke some fools, consider doing so in a hybrid electric vehicle. The electric engine is as silent and smooth as the body floating face down in the L.A. river.

Don't forget, human corpses are just as biodegradable as orange peels. Organize a compost heap where members can discard dead bitches. The resulting rich mulch can then be used to grow marijuana, ideal for your local farmer's market. And remember, whether it's weed, crack, or angel dust, be sure to offer customers reusable hemp-spun baggies. That one's a no-brainer.

Every gangbanger worth his weight in yayo knows the pleasures of an honest tag. However, aerosol spray paint releases harmful fumes into the ozone layer. Try tagging in natural, earth-friendly pastels, a selection of which can easily be stolen from your local art store.

On the subject of theft, don't go for the Korean owned liquor-hole around the block; oftentimes these smaller stores employ the use of cleaning supplies with dangerous chemicals. Instead, begin a grassroots movement to bring a more eco-friendly grocer to your community, such as Trader Joes or Whole Foods. Then rob those stores.

As Ice Cube once said, "Gangsters make the world go round…" Well gangbangers, it's 2008, and I say, "Gangsters make the world go green."