Judging a Book by Its Cover: Stori Telling by Tori Spelling

She isn’t fake. That’s just her hair and boobs.

First, do you get the joke? Stori Telling?

See, she changed the ‘Y’ in ‘STORY’ to an ‘I’, so that ‘STORY’ becomes ‘STORI’, just like her name. Get it? It sounds the same but now its got added meaning. I believe ‘wordplay’ is the technical name for it.

But wait, there’s more.

Tori bravely confesses that her boobs are fake. Fake! I was stunned. Still am. But get this: that’s just what we learn from the cover. You can only imagine how many other body parts she’ll admit are fake in the actual book.

Plus, she has enough good-judgment and common sense to show a little cleavage. Tori knows that nothing screams integrity quite like duct-taping your boobs together. Take note fellow lady writers: the best way to earn a reader’s trust and respect is to slap a photo of yourself on the cover with your rack pushed up to your chin.

And, she’s like, humble. She points out that the jewelry she wore to a red carpet event were loaners. See, she’s not mega rich. She’s just rich. Want to know why? It’s called “disinheritance”. Fascinating, huh? Well, I bet you can read all about this injustice in her memoir too.

The train doesn’t stop there. She also smartly scribbles these truths all over the cover with a giant pink marker. This alone tells me that her stories about summer camp in Malibu and her really fast metabolism are told with enormous depth and weight.

So if you’re having a craving for realiti (ha-ha), give Stori Telling a read. Tori is so fake, she’s real.